“To have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.”
These were the vows Heather and I took over eight years ago when we united in marriage. “In sickness and in health” stand out to me. I cannot comprehend why so many husbands disregard those five words, “IN SICKNESS AND IN HEALTH!!!” If your wife is not feeling well, you NEED to support her; it’s your obligation.
When Life Gets Hard
From the bible, Ephesians 5:22, “Husbands, love your wife as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it… So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church… For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh“.
Maybe if you in your flesh felt like she does in her flesh, you’d think and act differently. When my wife was sick, I didn’t truly understand how she was feeling or what she was going through. I just knew that she needed my full support… financial, emotional and physical.
When we first got married, Heather and I were doing pretty well. We both had decent corporate jobs and a loving little Jack Russell (soon to be a second) while living in northern California. In a short period of time, we managed to pay off all the debt we incurred from our move from NJ to CA, and were able to start putting some away for our future while we purchased a house.
Shortly after we exchanged our vows, life hit us pretty hard. We had a number of stressful occurrences in a very short period of time, consisting of the death of my father and Heather’s step-father, a job loss, the purchase of the previously aforementioned house, and the economy taking a turn for the worse, among many other things.
During this time, Heather’s health started to suffer. My initial thoughts were, “go catch a workout, you’ll feel better.” That’s our mindset as men, but it’s not necessarily what your wife needs.
Heather was going from doctor to doctor, specialist to specialist, seeking answers, but kept coming up empty. She was told, “It’s allergies”, or “it’s nothing”, or “it’s in your head.” Looking at the picture below, does it look like it was in her head? I don’t…
When Life Seemingly Keeps Throwing You Curve Balls
For over a year and a half, the medical system constantly misdiagnosed her, sending her into a physical and emotional tailspin, to the point that she had to leave her new job because she couldn’t strum up the energy to even get out of bed. Sure, health insurance was paying for some of it, but who cares. Not only was it not helping, but it almost cost us her life.
Then, the economy hit harder and I lost my job too. But there was a light… Heather, with her type A personality, not taking the answers she was given for face value, continued to research her issues, implement things on our own from our own professional background in nutrition and wellness, and access natural practitioners trying to piece together solutions.
One of the many natural practitioners we accessed on this journey to try to piece together solutions, happened to be 3,000 miles away and we would need for Heather to travel, and stay there for an undetermined amount of days to try different natural treatments. At the time we couldn’t afford it. (Oh, and by the way, we were losing our house at the time too) Not really understanding what was going on, or what this practitioner was going to do, my response was, “We can’t afford not to.”
We bled our savings and threw her on a plane, set her up in a hotel, and she spent thirteen days at his office. He diagnosed her with Hashimoto’s, chronic fatigue, partial lupus, eczema, systemic candida and liver toxicity, among other things. How did all the medical doctors miss this stuff? Answer, they don’t understand where to look.
And, this was just the BEGINNING of her restoration journey, which would require her to seek further treatment from natural practitioners for the next year and a half to piece together solutions, and also invest to return to school to become a nutritionist professionally.
She returned home from her trip, sought care from more natural practitioners to continue to find resolve for her energy, her chronic skin issues, her metabolism, and overall health. We would even have to invest in her becoming a Functional Nutritionist professionally for her to create complete resolve in her body, literally having to come full circle to become a professional which leads us to the work we do serving others today.
In the end, we invested, in excess of $60,000 to discover all the pieces necessary to restore her health & it would lead us to our discover our e3 Energy Evolved System to resolving these imbalances in mind, body and spirit completely.
And, what we discovered on that journey is there is a lot of strategy being missed in the approach of doctors and natural practitioners that can significantly hasten transformation in the body to make people’s journey more cost & time effective, and we had these aha-moments along Heather’s journey about more areas that were being missed yet because of our former work in competitive athletics, nutrition & psychology, which is out of the scope of work of most doctors and natural practitioners.
So, in hindsight, while frustrating & expensive at the time, it led us down the path to the work we do today restoring thyroid, autoimmune and metabolic function naturally & powerfully for women and men around the world, right from their very own homes regardless of country or location. This costly journey to us, that we found lacked significant important strategy in some ways to help people restore quickly, is exactly why we began our e3 Energy Evolved mission.
If any of this sounds like your journey, and you’re tired of traveling all over creation and the money and time it requires for you to do so, contact our team here to set up a Functional Nutrition & Metabolic Restoration Consultation with our Functional Nutritionist & Diagnostic Nutritionist team, and learn how you can receive life-changing transformation with our lab-based results-driven programs without ever leaving your home.
You Don’t Give Up
Little did we know at that time that aside from all these health and education expenses to find her way back to wellness, our food bill would almost double and we were looking at a good sum of money every month towards nutraceuticals, none of which insurance would cover (because it actually works), and none of which was in our budget. But, that’s what our credit cards, cashing out investments if we have them to access, and what our savings are for.
They’re not for big screen TV’s, vacations, fancy clothes, house remodels, etc. Credit cards are for emergencies, and this was, in our opinion, an emergency that was threatening her existence. And guess what. If we hadn’t taken the risk, my wife would likely not be here today.
Fast forward 6 years, over $40K+ in out-of-pocket medical expenses, and $100’s of thousands of dollars more in education, training and business expenses to be here today to help others around the world out of the same pitfalls in health, and a ton of praying, & we’ve created a mission to help other women offering lab-based bio-individualized programs to restore thyroid, autoimmune, and metabolic health naturally from the peace & comfort of their own homes, so that you don’t have to go through the chaotic and financially disruptive battles what we went through.
Unfortunately, for many of you, the biggest thing standing in your way of healing is the second half of your flesh, your husband.
Here are some of the questions I’ve been asked by many of the husbands of the wives that are our Private Distance e3 Energy Evolved “e3 Restore” Members Online, when their wives comes to us for thyroid, autoimmune & metabolic consultation:
- Is what my wife’s going through real? (Yes it is)
- Why doesn’t my wife want to be intimate with me? (She’s not comfortable in her own skin, her hormones are in disarray, and she just doesn’t feel “sexy”. Allow her to correct that and she will want the same.)
- She doesn’t look sick, how do I know it’s not just in her head? (In many cases, by the time her illness shows itself on the outside, her illness is just that much more progressed. If she doesn’t feel well, she’s not well and needs your support.)
- The medical doctors ran some tests and everything’s normal. (If she has symptoms, everything is not normal. The medical doctors are trained to run certain tests looking for certain markers, but don’t spend any time asking questions of your wife, or even looking at the underlying causes of her health complaints)
A Message To Husbands From Damian
To all the husbands out there… It doesn’t matter whether or not you understand, or even believe what your wife is going through is legitimate. What matters is that you support her in every way possible, and yes, it is legit.
Men and women are built completely different. Women take on more stress than we can fathom. They’re taking care of the house, tending to the kids, preparing meals for the family… oh, and maybe even working a full-time job too. And that whole child-bearing thing… It takes from her more than you can imagine. With all that women are faced with today, and other forms of metabolic stressors that most people are not truly aware of that are challenging their bodies systemically, it’s no wonder so many have thyroid, adrenal, digestive, immune and skin problems.
Rather than let your wife tailspin into a state of chronic fatigue which happened for Heather and was very dangerous at the end, which can happen easily for any woman left in a state of these chronic imbalances too long over time, man up and support her. Help her with the cooking, dishes and laundry. Ask her if there’s something she needs (and ladies, don’t be afraid to ask for what you need. We’re not mind-readers, and to be honest, we’re kind of lazy when it comes to this stuff).
One thing I’ve learned over the last 7 years is, try to help out more.
One thing Heather’s learned during that same time period is to not to be afraid to ask for more help.
Help to give your wife the tools she needs to better her health.
It’s your obligation as a husband in a committed marriage to support your family including your wife, not just your children, as a man in what she needs to thrive.
If you need leadership to restore your thyroid, autoimmune, and metabolic health naturally, and you’d like to do it cost effectively right from the comfort of your own home with the leadership of a team that offers you the wisdom of personal experience, professional experience & strategic, powerful programs that offer you measurable physical results for your investment in specific periods of time, we have limited spots available throughout the year for acceptance into our life-changing e3 Restore Program, co-led by both my wife Functional Nutritionist, US National Level Natural NPC Figure Competitor & Mind-body Psychology Coach, Heather Dube´& myself, Diagnostic Nutritionist, Damian Dube´.
We have forever changed the lives & transformed the outcomes of our online e3 Restore Members naturally all over the world right from their own home here, members who have often sought help and solutions with no resolve for 15+ years from multiple doctors & natural practitioners, before seeking both functional wellness & metabolism resolution from our leadership program with proven results.
For enrollment consideration & to see if you’re a good fit for our e3 Restore Program, please contact our team for more information on how to schedule an initial Functional Nutritionist & Metabolic Restoration Consultation for a clinical assessment & labs review evaluation.
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Comments 15
Thank you.
You’re most welcome, Anna-Lisa. I’m glad you found this article helpful. -Damian, e3ee
Why is this written to husbands? My husband has Graves Disease its not a female medical condition. To be honest I need help. He is an emotional abusive wreck! There is no help for wives of husbands with this disease.
Because that was our personal experience over a decade ago. Nowhere in the article do we state this is “only a female disease”. We have female and male clients. All of the articles on our website would be supportive for your husband’s recovery. Please share with him. We understand the challenges of the journey for both spouses. You can contact our team on the Contact Us page, if you have further questions or would like to apply for enrollment into one of our support programs.
Thanks for the above article, Damian! I really appreciate your heart there! My husband has been great in so many ways, but I’ve limped along for way too many years. The do whatever it takes to get better attitude is truly encouraging.
Judy
I’m grateful to hear your husband has stepped up to support you, Judy. A determined “all in” mindset can go a long way. This approach we took as a team to Heather’s journey to restore her spirit & strength made a tremendous difference. Keep us updated on how you’re doing. – Damian, e3ee
Im a man. And after ready this article ive realized i havent been there for teresa. Shes my wife and recently we found out that she has hyperthyroidism. Shes had these symtoms for sometime, and the idiot that i am saw right past ir and didnt believe when she told me why she slept all day or why she didnt get anything done in the house that day or whatever the case may have been. This article has put the fear of losing my wife in me. And for that i thank you. I dont want to lose my wife, but at only 75lbs. I see her not makin it much longer. I really need help today. Im financially strapped at this moment and dont know what to do if i afford anything. We dont have anything. I make very good money, but im in debt up to eyeballs. Any advice will be very appreciated
Calvin, Our hearts go out to you and your wife, especially having experienced this ourselves personally, before becoming professionals in Functional Nutrition & Energy Medicine, to restore my life. Thank you for sharing your story with us openly and with courage. A few things we can suggest right away – please go to our “guide” page & download our free e3 Energy Evolved System Guide for your wife. In there, you’ll find some beginning education on the areas of “energy” you need to become aware of to rebalance her energy in, her energy out and energy environment – which is our e3 Energy Evolved System, and what we used to improve my own health naturally when I was quite sick with thyroid & autoimmune disease myself. There are also a bunch of our original recipes in there which she should start cooking right away, if she’s experiencing fatigue, and what sounds like weight imbalance. Finally, hydrating with enough clean water is critical. It’s one of the most underemphasized things people think of when we’re unwell – however, making sure you’re eliminating the chemicals in it (including fluoride) that are coming into our bodies through our skin in our shower / bath water as well as our drinking water is one of the first and most powerful moves you can make to restore health. While there are a lot of options out there, the advanced shower and water filters available in the store on our website are not only what we used to heal my own illness naturally, but also what we recommend to all our private clients for their advanced filtration capabilities. We’d highly suggest if you can save up to purchase them it will help her body tremendously. These are all a great place to begin. Please also join our newsletter list by putting your name / email into the field at the bottom footer of our website, or on our website home page, and you’ll receive our weekly newsletter where we send our free “energy & wellness restoration” resources and education for all our readers around the world every Sunday, so you can keep adding into her wellness creation process. On your own, you can also consider all the forms of mental, emotional, physical and environmental stress she has control of to eliminate as much as possible, so her body can begin to find the space necessary to restore physical peace. If we can do anything else for you or your wife Teresa, please email our customer service team at hello@e3EnergyEvolved.com to let us know. In restoration, Heather Dubé
informative from a husband side. willing to support more. keep up ur doing a good job…
We’re happy to hear that. On behalf of our team, thank you for your positive thoughts & kindness. It’s our honor to be of service.
Hello,
As a husband for 15 years, I just found this article because unlike the stereotypical male you have portrayed here, I am the opposite. Meaning I have had a wife for 10 years, known her for 15 and who has had hypo from day one and found out she has Hashi’s, which evidently her mom and grandmother had and no one talked about it. I have watched this great women, who is a HORRIBLE procrastinator fight me every year in trying to get her to get better and help her. I am the one who has done all the research, talked to all the experts, etc and yet my wife thinks everything that is wrong with our relationship and her has nothing to do with what she has. I literally had to force her to go see better doctors, to which she is still not seeing the right ones, I have deal with so much rage and fear increasingly every year. I have worked to take so much stress off her back over the years as she’s a slight work a holic and doesn’t place much emphasis on health, etc. I do all the cooking, finances, cleaning, and anything possible to help her/us out but all I have received return is a glass half empty person to which in the last year when she was finally told she is in Stage 4 of Hashimoto’s (since all she’s done is a pill) she still has done 25% of what needs to be done. I can’t bring things up because she gets defensive (big tomboy and competitive athletic girl/woman) and her family weren’t exactly talkers growing up…great family, just not talkers or proactive about health. I am literally beyond at the end of my rope, to the point that I just started talking with lawyers because there is nothing else I can do because everything out of my mouth she filters and interprets in her head in crazy ways and negative. I will put her on a plane in a heartbeat to come see someone to help her get better but it’s going to have to be a “scared straight” type atmosphere because she won’t do it any other way. Anything that comes out of my mouth, even though I’m just copying and pasting from experts like your all, is viewed as me telling her what’s right versus seeing it as a chance to get better. I’ve had this woman yell at me that her only goal in life is to prove what she has, has nothing to do with our relationship or issues going on in her life. If this was year one of us being together, I’d be in it for the long haul but this is year 10 of being married and I’ve been through this for ten years with someone that’s not proactive and been getting worse every year and doesn’t realize how bad this is affecting our relationship nor how bad it’s been affecting her husband who’s been the “whipping boy” for the longest time..even though out of all her family and friends, I am the only one…the only one…who really knows what is going on and has put 100% of my time into helping her become aware and get better. So if you both can help, in any way shape or form, it’s going to have to be in person in front of her really digging into areas of emotions and mental health that I think she’s afraid to admit or deal with….but I am willing to try one last thing, I just can’t do it anymore beyond that. Appreciate your time.
Hi Christian, I want to applaud you for your courage to share your experience and truth openly. It shows you are ready to heal as a couple, whether your partner is ready to or not. Your story is all too common. This dis-ease ravages savings accounts, jobs, relationships, marriages, individuality, spirituality, our physicality, and so much more. It is not a question of if our team can change this woman’s reality in a complete 180, from psychology to the science. We can for anyone. And all our e3 Restore clients rest from the comfort of their home conveniently and cost-effectively, while we support them clinically and mentally through this life-changing transformational process. Distance is irrelevant when you have a proven system that replicates the same results for each human mind and body successfully over and over, like we do – and, in fact, resting from home is an advantage to getting her faster outcomes. The only factors are 1 – is she coachable / willing to take leadership direction from experts who have time & again proven to reverse these conditions naturally & completely for your lifetime in just weeks to months, 2 – is she in the mental place that she is in gratitude for her human body, and what we call “ready to heal” & willing to do what it takes, 3 – is she ready to take COMPLETE personal responsibility and ownership for her quality of life and health. I’d like to continue this conversation to help you, and potentially her in a more private forum. We don’t offer enrollment into our e3 Restore Program to everyone – there is only our team, and there are billions that need our level of bio-individualized managed care to disease-free and medication-free health. They have to meet those qualifications at the time of application for enrollment. In defense of your wife, I do not feel it is fair to make assumptions of where she is at this moment on her journey with her body, over a blog comment thread. She has a voice and is obviously going through a struggle in her own way. What I will say, as hard as it is, we cannot wish or will life path choices onto others no matter how much we love them, and I say that with deep empathy for you, as a soul in pain, knowing what this walk is having once walked it personally together with my own husband, and how we had to stand for each other and our marriage during that time in order to make it through what was literally living through hell for us for a long period, not just due to this dis-ease, but all the ways it bled out into every single area of our lives and just crushed everything in its path. I would love for you to contact us privately through our contact form, so we know where to reach out to you and your wife to explore what she’s looking to create for the rest of her life, and give you some advise as well. We will respond when we receive your contact form. In restoration, Heather
Hello,
I am in a very difficult situation dealing with my wife’s hyperthyroidism and several other mental conditions. I’m trying my best to be supportive and understanding, but she is increasingly getting meaner, more irrational, pushing me away and forbids me to do anything that brings me joy that I have always done. So I work, go to the store and come home. Even though I take care of the majority of things and am the only one working, she says I’m not there for her the way she needs me to be and has threatened divorce and even suicide. It really angers me and make me feel sad. That isn’t the woman I met. I feel like I’m being gas lit or manipulated at times. Other times, I have a hard time totally believing that she doesn’t have some sort of control or at least mildly understanding her illness. I’ve tried to keep my thoughts to myself, but when she gets upset at that, we end up fighting and yelling. I’m growing bitter and resentful as time goes on and I sens that she is too in a different way. I know I’m supposed to take care of myself in order to take care of her, but I’m finding I’m at my wits end and need to continue some part of me for an outlet, but she won’t have it. I know this is about her and not me, but I need to continue to do some of the things that make me happy. Her anxiety, irrational thinking and irritability is running wild. I realize there is no quick fix, but I am desperately trying to find a solution to fix our marriage and bring happiness to our family again. How can I get in touch with you to discuss more in detail and to go over some options?
We are sorry to hear of your families challenges. Sadly, with these elusive systemic health challenges, this is all too common. Please reach out to our customer support team at hello@e3EnergyEvolved.com to purchase and schedule a Functional Health Assessment with our two-clinician team in Functional Bio-Individualized Nutrition & Energy Medicine/Psychology for initial evaluation and recommendations on what the path will be to restore her mental, emotional, physical and spiritual capacities to their full, balanced state again. It is not uncommon that the husbands of our female clients are as excited about their wives progress as our female clients are, and they report experiencing enhanced marital connection and joy through our e3 Restore program, as they finally get their wife back.
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