Every challenge or problem I’ve successfully solved or created a new result for myself in my life and health was a journey of success that first began in my outlook. There is a psychology of change I’ve always utilized to be successful at beating health circumstance naturally most still say or believe is “impossible”. But, our human mind is an extremely powerful, yet sadly under used tool today.
I have never chosen to commiserate about my problem or health issue, focus on it, or congregate around people with my same problem in “support groups” that have nothing to offer me, but more “talking about” and “magnified focus on” a problem I’d like to get rid of.
People that sit around and talk about and “relate” about the same problem don’t have your individual solution, let alone their own individual solution, the only thing they have to offer you is an opportunity to “stew more” in your problem which only skews your mindset even more towards … you guessed it, believing you “have to have” a problem, and OH GOSH look at all these people around me with this same “impossible to solve” problem that’s weighing thousands of people down, how will I ever get past this when all these people around me can’t get past this either. How does doing this to your mind lead you towards creating a renewed outcome or SOLUTION? It doesn’t, it prevents you from it!!
Instead, I’ve very intentionally moved away from things like “support groups” because what we choose to focus on & put ourselves around magnifies & grows, I’ve focused on seeking out best-in-class professionals and specialized experts out with the proven solution I desired to create and getting around them as much as possible to learn from and mentor with them, even if that meant opening up my search to travel to work with professionals around the country online or in person, looking for that 1% of successful professionals or game changers who demonstrated their own success I could learn to emulate, and if I couldn’t find those with the solution I needed in the time-frame I needed, well then I just decided to work my tail off to become the professional myself to create my own renewed solution & result. My husband Damian Dubé is the exact same way.
I’ve had to figure out outside the medical system twice in my lifetime how to beat not one, but two rare health circumstances naturally & drug-free — a lifetime neurological movement disorder, & my battle with Hashimoto’s, chronic fatigue, auto immune disease, candida, toxicity and partial Lupus in my early 30’s.
But, most people will not do these things, they make the mistakes of gravitating physically & mentally to more of the existing problem they have & lack a solution for. They focus on “why is this happening to me”, they focus on what they “can’t do” vs. what they can, they focus on wanting someone else or insurance to fix it for them, which it never will.
“Change” is not a result or action… it is first & foremost a DECISION.
Nothing changes until we CHOOSE change for ourselves first, and how we allow our minds and eyes to focus when we have a problem or challenge is definitive to whether we will ever successfully get past it in our lives.
When I was young my parents would take me downhill skiing. One night in the freezing temps of Vermont, I was hitting the bumps with my step-father, and I was tired, but he wanted to keep going. I must have been only 8 years old or so. Shortly, I fell and face planted in the snow, I was covered in snow and freezing, and I just wanted to go home, and I started bawling. I recall this moment as clear as day, it was one of the most definitive mindset shifts for me in my lifetime.
I fell, I was down, I was uncomfortable, I wasn’t getting what I wanted in that moment, so my mind’s natural immediate reaction was to sit there stuck where I’d fallen and feel despair, and emotionally cry, because that is what the human brain will do typically.
And here was my parent standing over me, and instead of consoling me, he asked me dead serious, “Why in the world are you crying? Get back up, wipe off the snow & let’s go ski some more!”
From the outside this may seem completely uncaring, and yet it’s a lesson I’ve since taken for 30+ years with me that I’ve used to generate tremendous strength through challenges to create a boatload of life, career, athletic & wellness success when life has since knocked us down, repeatedly. Because in that moment, I had the empowering realization from his question, that my reaction was always my choice — it was MY CHOICE to stay down after I’d fallen, it was MY CHOICE to see it as something to cry or “emote” that way about.
Instead, if I wanted to, I could tap into what I didn’t know at that time is a psychology term known as my “locus of control”, and I could alternatively choose to stand back up, dust myself off, be grateful for the opportunity to enjoy the amazing scenery and mountains around me, even though I was a little tired and cold. So what? I could focus on finding & seeking the positive or the solution vs. the negative or the problem. And, that’s exactly what I did in that moment & I’ve never looked back since after that AHA-moment.
We are constantly in control of where we allow our minds to go & to not go, despite our circumstance, which is the lens that creates our “reality”. And where we allow our mental focus to go can either lend to, or completely block us from moving forward in a positive manner in our lives or our ability to create positive change.
Life is hard for everyone, but those who successfully move past lives greatest challenges to create new results are those who are willing to take their outcomes into their own hands regardless of “why” something happened to them. They don’t really waste their thinking or energy on all that other stuff; they focus on what will move them forward & doing that over & over above all else. And, they surely don’t hesitate when change knocks on the door or slaps them in face, they run as fast as they can directly in its direction. They’re movers & shakers, and they don’t question or allow fear to stop them from stepping into change when the proper resources, professionals & mentors that can help them tremendously come across their paths, just as we’ve never done in our lifetimes, which is why we’ve been hugely successful on multiple paths of transforming our results.
There is a great quote…”The 3 C’s: Choices, Chances, Changes. You must make a CHOICE to take a CHANCE or your life will never CHANGE.” …and this is always been how we’ve lived, and why we’ve successfully beat rare health issues, and successfully created other areas of transformation in our lives like beginning a successful business to help others do the same today also while fighting tremendous challenges like a medical bankruptcy, chronic illness, and dual career changes mid-life.
HERE ARE MY 5 MINDSET STEPS TO SUCCESSFUL CHANGE…
This is my professional approach to the psychology of change, and psychology and coaching psychology are part of my education background:
- Move AWAY from others with the same problem you’re trying to solve vs. moving towards them; hanging out in these “support groups” is one of the absolute worst things you can do, all it does is keep you stuck – seriously? Why are you hanging out with the people that have the same results you have that you DON’T want, and how does that help create different results? Think about it. Research consistently proves who we allow around us, and who our closest friends are, has a direct effect on us & our results.
- Stop focusing your mind and emotions more on the problem; talking to others with the same problem about how rough it is, sitting in fear, depression, panic and/or problem-centric thinking does nothing but magnify your problem and block you from change.
- Seek out professionals who have proven to achieve the results repeatedly that will solve your problem & learn from them as mentors as much as you can, at as high a level as individually as you can – mentoring works & leads to fast, potent transformation, period.
- If you can’t find them, choose to become the professional yourself to solve your problem through investing in formal education to become the actual professional that can create your own solution.
- Be willing to make #3 or #4 a priority above other things in your life at least temporarily to invest your effort, time and money in them until you have created the solution you desire, or don’t bother with steps 1 through 4 because you’ll never solve your problem then anyway, sorry to say, but appreciate the honesty, because the reality is TRUTH is the ONLY THING that can move you forward.
Powerful solutions & new realities exist for all of us; it’s just most people are keeping themselves from them because they lack making the right CHOICES, in the right order, on the journey that lead to powerful CHANGE.
If you’re tired of “spinning” in circles, and ready to take control of your outcomes with professionals with a proven track-record of repeat, powerful & fast transformation results, then you’re in the right place & we are excited to partner with you as our newest distance member in our bio-individualized online lab-based functional nutrition & lifestyle mentoring programs as a team to generate your new human body reality through our unique, comprehensive form of progressive natural wellness & metabolism restoration approach.
Most of our e3 Energy Evolved distance members we are humbled to support online in their natural wellness & metabolism restoration change process, are shocked to realize how quickly their bodies can change for them in a way they’ve never experienced before. There are just human body natural transformation truths so few have ever been exposed to yet.
The cool thing is you can schedule to have a powerful “change” conversation with our team right now & take the first step to create forward movement out of the human body circumstance you’ve been stuck in.
So, where have you been making mistakes that have been holding your change back, in trying to create a different result in your wellness, or life, that you can possibly see now through my “psychology of change” recommendations above?
What changes will you take away from the above that you’ll begin implementing today?
Share with me and Damian in the comments box below.
Author: Heather Dubé, HHC, AADP, ACSM CWC, NASM CPT, NC Cand. & BA Psychology, is a Functional Nutrition Practitioner, US National-Level Natural NPC Figure Bodybuilding Competitor & Contributing Expert Magazine Writer with 24 years experience, and Co-Founder of the e3 Energy Evolved™ System.
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